Ok blog buddies, most of you cook. It doesn't matter how often, or how well. In fact, it is ok if you have cooked only a few times in your entire life, or if your cooking triumphs pale in comparison to your cooking tragedies. The topic of this post is irrelevant to these facts.
My real question is: What are your dirty cooking secrets? Those particular techniques that are unorthodox and not recommended, but you follow them anyway? Things that, if you were cooking live with Jamie Oliver or Rachel Ray, you would be embarassed to admit and show the audience?
If you want, you can post some in your blog. We promise not to judge you or report you to the culinary arts police. Unless your improvisations have caused severe food poisoning and could be considered as attempted murder in a court of law, of course... (Just joking!) My own confessions are:
1. I rarely sift my flour and dry ingredients in general when making dessets. Ok, lie detector, you caught me! Actually, I NEVER sift them!
2. I always substitute baking soda with baking powder, even if only the opposite is "allowed". Oddly enough, I have never encountered a "disgusting and bitter baking powder chunk" in my desserts.
3. I never wear gloves when cooking. Actually, I am a freak, and my choice of profession suggests it! I like touching dead stuff (ie meat). But yes, I wash my hands thoroughly. I guess my choice of profession suggests that as well.
4. I don't use shortening. Actually, I don't know what "shortening" is. My knowledge of English doesn't expand to this particular term. Seriously. And as I am too lazy to look it up on a dictionary, over the years, I have come to the conclusion that shortening = butter. What? Shortening is NOT butter exactly? Oh, well, I am too old to change my ways now...
5. I am a student, living on a budget and moving frequently. So, both my income and my lifestyle don't allow me to buy fancy cooking equipment. As a result, I cook using basic stuff only - and I highlighted the word "basic" here. Which would explain why, if I appeared on a show with Jamie, I would look at objects like a garlic press / a springform pan / a crockpot / a rice cooker / a pizza slicer, etc with the same amazement Colombus had when he reached the American continent!
6. Not embarassing enough? Ok, how about this: I don't know how to use a microwave. And of course I don't own a freezer. It's a vicious circle, guys.
7. I love baking, and my friends tell me I have a hand for it. However, I only loosely follow the FRoB (First Rule of Baking) which, as we all know, is: "Thou shalt ALWAYS measure your ingredients". Well, I do measure them. I really, trully do. Only I lack some unnecessary things called "measuring cup" and "measuring spoons"! But hey, at least I always use the same cup to measure when baking something. Unless it needs washing, of course - then I just use another! Duh!
8. I don't know how to de-gut a fish. You know, take all the inside parts of the fish out and make it ready-to-use for cooking. To those who don't really know me, I apologise for it, saying that I think it is plain disgusting. They seem to be ok with it, and show some sympathy. However, Ernesto doesn't. The problem is that he knows me a little too well, and says that I actually thrive on disgusting stuff. So, he seems to imply that I am just to lazy to learn, and pass this chore onto him. My reply? Well... No comment!
9. The most embarassing moment in my cooking history was when I made a mean fruit tart. Actually, you might now it as White chocolate fruit tart on AR, and it was good beyond description. In fact, it was so good, that when Ernesto dropped the last piece on the floor, he didn't hesitate for a moment - he just picked it up and continued eating it!!! (Picture Joey from "Friends", in the scene where a cheesecake piece is lying on the floor. The same cheesecake piece, over which Rachel and Chandler had been fighting for the whole episode. He just comes in, sees them nibble off the floor, takes a fork out of his jacket and drops the killer line "What are we having???!!!)
Um, wait... that's not an embarassing moment for me, but for Ernesto! Oh well... now that it's out there, it's really hard to take it back! (To his defense, I am a hypochondriac, who cleans the floors 12396 times a day - but I know, it's still yuck!)
I know it would have been much better to write 10 things instead of 9. If I had done so, my list would be more "proper" and "decent". But now that I've come to thing about it, there isn't one single thing in this particular list that it's decent anyway... so I'll just leave it the way it is.
That's all folks! Your turn now! Share if you dare!
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